Where to begin . . . first off, we'd like to apologize for the week off that we took seemingly for no reason at all, and also for the smallness of this episode.  It can all be explained away by the fact that Zen . . . well, is kinda dumb.  Last month's shows were released in a haphazard manner and left us with no storage space on our server at the end of the month.  We had just enough room to squeeze this smallish release in, but rest assured that this will never happen again.  We are back on a regular recording schedule and shows will come out weekly and at their regular length starting next week.

This show is definitely worth checking out, however.  The show, like a finely tuned podcasting racecar, goes from zero to porn in 3.6 minutes.  What's the deal with "quickies" . . . and are men predisposed to liking quickies through years of speed masturbating?  Of course.

Ray has a new lady friend.  We may have mentioned her in previous episodes of The Zen and Peace Show.  We'll have to give her a new nickname because, amazingly enough, Ray hasn't completely screwed things up (yet.)  So for now we'll call her "Bleepie Baby"  The reason will be clear enough once you here the show.

If you've recently become a fan on our Facebook page (located at facebook.com/doubledpodcast) then you get your shoutout during this episode.  If you haven't joined our page and gotten your shoutout yet, head on over.  You're only a "like button" click away.

Jefe Smythe, our most prolific caller inner, graces us with 4 more drunken voice mails.  Tales from open auditions for American Idol and plenty of inebriated singing.  The Hoff never sounded so good.

We'll talk at ya next week.  If you're in the area and are going to the Coconino County Fair this weekend, keep your eyes peeled.  Maybe we'll see you there.  If you have anything to say about the Fair, or Fairs and Carnivals in general, give us an email or a call.

So Jefe Smythe was in San Francisco trying out for American Idol along with Chuy D.  Like a true amigo, he bowed out when Chuy failed to advance along with him, so America will not get the opportunity to hear him sing I Hate You When You're Pregnant's "Rims and Tires."  Double D Podcast listeners, however, get to hear the 27 second remix.  Enjoy!

Longtime supporter of the show Cousin Dave Diaz joins the show this week for a long anticipated episode that celebrates beer, porn and football, the three pillars of American society.  In fact, it is only three minutes into the recording that we started talking about pornography.  Brooke Lee Adams.  Jesse Jane.  Two of our favorite performers.  Do a Google Image search.

This week we partook in some Tilt Malt Beverage Energy Drink, Happy Camper IPA, Pinstripe Red Ale, Buster Nut Brown Ale and True Blonde Ale all three from the Ska Brewing Company, Twisted Tea Half and Half and some leftover Natural Ice.

Cousin Dave listens to several podcasts besides the Double D and recommends The Bill Burr Monday Morning Podcast.  That would be "Monday", not "Money" like Zen thought.

We turn our discussion to age, courtesy of Zen's upcoming 37th Birthday.  Is age a state of mind?  How old were each of us respectively when we first discovered that we were "the old guy" in a group of friends?

This is 'Merica.  Its not Futbol, it's football.  The Cincinnati Bungles.  Why we hate the Dallas Cowboys.

Zen's Childhood Traumatic Story #1 - Marcos and the Cowboys.

Fishbowl, courtesy of Sandpaper Love

Viagra Talk, as a result of a question from our friend Beantown.  Is Viagra popular in the gay community?

Zen's Childhood Traumatic Story #2 - Middle School P.E. Boner

More gay talk - is "poking" on facebook acceptable among heterosexual males?  We proclaim the only 3 times when it is acceptable to poke another man.

Bi-Polar Bears, courtesy of Stuyvesant

 

Stuyvesant
"Bi-Polar Bears" (mp3)
from "Jihad Me At Hello"
(Dromedary Records)

Buy at iTunes Music Store
Buy at Amazon MP3
More On This Album

The ridiculous statement that it is gay to watch anything BESIDES lesbian porn.  We debunk this one quickly.  Point of View Porn.  When it comes to dirty movies, sharing is caring.  The types of porn we DON'T like.  The Crooked Hooter Channel, or descrambling Spice.  

Zen's Childhood Traumatic Story #3 - Straight Up Now Tell Me

Wheelchair and Amputee Porn.  Midget Porn.  Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.

Friday Night (Live), courtesy of Los Lonely Boys

 

Los Lonely Boys
"Friday Night" (mp3)
from "Live At Blue Cat Blues - Dallas Texas"
(Blue Cat Blues Records)

Buy at iTunes Music Store
Buy at Amazon MP3
More On This Album

Progressively drunker voice mails from Jeff Smith.  Facebook Fan Page Shout-Outs to Jera Diaz, Jesca Rene and crybaby Lawrence Duran.

Final Song, I Am Not Robot, courtesy of The Phenomenauts

 

The Phenomenauts
"I Am Not Robot" (mp3)
from "Electric Sheep: Electronic Extended Play"
(Silver Sprocket)

Buy at iTunes Music Store
Buy at Amazon MP3
More On This Album

Ray's Pig Joke.

We Double Down this episode by doubling the number of damn dudes hosting the podcast from dos to cuatro.  Shane Dween, mentioned many times in previouse episodes, finally joins us as does another friend and co-worder who goes by the nickname C.C. Rider.  C.C., a homebrewer and super-host, opens up his house, his fridge and many bottles of his specialty home-brewed Berry Ale for the podcast this week.   A big shout out goes out to him for his hospitality.

While this episode is hilarious thanks to the expanded cast, there were some unexpected snafus that cropped up and kept this from being a perfect show.  Foolishly we used a setup we had never used before and some untested equipment.  The raw recording was almost unlistenable, it was so filled with static and buzzing.  We cleaned it up the best we could but do apologize for having a less than perfect show to present this week.  Give it a listen, though, because on the strength of C.C.'s Berry Ale we had one of the funnest and funniest shows yet.

Shane Dween was quizzed on his knowledge of Jimmie Johnson and Ricky Bobby quotes, C.C. was quizzed on his knowledge of Microbrews and Ray quizzed us all on what exactly constitutes gay sex.  The Professor (see album art) settled last episodes bet on what company introduced the first light beer and when and we played a hilarious voice mail from Cousin Dave.  How exactly are NASCAR fans like Twilight fans?  We have a top 5 list to show you the similarities. 

After listening to this episode we think you'll have to agree that Shane and C.C. should return sometime in the future under better recording conditions because they are truly funny dudes.

Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We're living the High Life this week.  Literally.  As we drink our Miller High Life, the conversation naturally turns to Wisconson and breweries and Laverne and Shirley.  Shotz Beer.  Lenny and the Squigtones.   Making love to a giant marionette leads to splinterdick.

Once again, we cover Miller's Give a Vet a Taste of the High Life program.  Read about it at www.MillerHighLife.com

The High Life Guy commercials and the old Errol Morris directed Miller commercials.

 

 

Deviled Eggs vs. Avocados.  Which is more gross.  The Girl in the Moon and Peeking in the Box.

Music - Los Angeles

Second Segment.  It never rains in Southern California but in Flagstaff it pours.  Flooding.  Kayaking down Beaver Street.  SoCal vacation wrapup.  The Ocean is cool, but why does it have to be so full of fish?  Sea World's best show has ZERO animals in it.  X Games 16.  Moto X Best Trick contest highlights with Cam Sinclair and Paris Rosen.

 

 

 

True L.A. flavor - Thugs and Winos.  Ray parties with one-legged homeless dudes.  Warheads vs. Atomic Fireballs.

Music - Have Faith in Me

Third Segment.  Pelon Pelo Rico.  Mexican candy and grocery stores.  Luau Pig.  Koreatown.  Professor Van der Liquor explains "ice" beers and the ice brewing process.  The Ice Cream Man.  The Waka Man.  The best treats to have at Dairy Queen.

Music - Ra Ra Ra

Last Segment.  Ray's pictures from Stacy Lynn.  PSA.  We reach out to our listening public to help Flagstaff resident Collin Hamilton who is suffering from stage 3 colon cancer.  A benefit will be held locally at The Museum Club on September 26th.  More details in upcoming episodes.

Subscribe on iTunes, leave a review, tell a friend.  Give us a call at 4242 Drunks.  Email Zen and Ray at doubledpodcast@gmail.com and NOW YOU CAN EMAIL THE PROFESSOR ANY BEER QUESTIONS YOU MAY HAVE!

VanDerLiquor@gmail.com

Music - Eye of Fatima

 

We apologize for the long delay in getting this episode out.  Ray was in Northern California for a week's worth of vacation time and the very next week Zen was in Southern California.  Go figure.  Anyway, we start the show with details from Ray's trip, by the numbers:

• 5 baseball games in 6 days
• 400 to 500 dollars spent in beer alone
• 4 front row Oakland A's tickets at 60 bucks apiece
• 16 hot dogs
• 3 30 packs of Natural Ice
• 1,000's of drunken texts and picture messages
• 2 giant foam A's novelty cowboy hats (see album art)
• 1 hilarious voicemail

Suck the Red Fox.  Suck the White Fox.  A couple of shots of Parrot Bay Rum toast "Fathers and Sons, Baseball and Beer".  Then we slide into our first break.  Jungle Fever

This episode Ray was drinking left over Natty Ice.  Zen was drinking Mike's Margaritas and Dos Equis.  National Tequila Day.  Roger Clyne's Mexican Moonshine.  What is Ice Brewing?  More NorCal stories.  What is the Gayer Sports Apparel:  Sharks Jersey or L.A. Galaxy Scarf?  Tie Games in Soccer . . . tie games are like kissing your sister.  The obnoxious Vuvuzela App on Blackberry.  Ray hates New York sports teams.  The office NASCAR pool and the unstoppable "Zen Jinx".  The Max Papis Memorial Trophy.  Our second break.  War's Lowrider

Hot Shots Part Deux Movie quotes.  "Not playing to win is like sleeping with your sister.  Sure, she's a great piece of tail and a blouse full of goodies, but it's just illegal."  Buying 20 DVDs for 20 bucks from a failing video store.  Voicemail from Cousin Dave.  Midgets vs. Mascots.  Gary Coleman vs. Scotty Pippen.  Our last break.  Matt and Kim

Twitter!  Follow us at twitter.com/zendehoag and twitter.com/biscuitray !  We also recommend following twitter.com/sarrahpalinU5A (note that it is two "r"s and a 5 instead of S in the USA)

Final song is a cover of End of the Road performed by Me First and the Gimme Gimmes.

Enjoy!

Double D - Depressed and Disappointed . . . mainly with the Dutch and the sudden end to their run at the FIFA World Cup title.  We briefly mourn (or at least Zen does) their loss to the Dirty Spanish in the Final but then quickly move on to more entertaining subjects.

In Old Business, we revisit Ray's mention of Miller High Life's Bottle Caps for the Troops program.  We finally get the details correct and hope you all will support this worthy program like we plan to.  Hey, at the very least it's a good excuse to drink some beer.  Speaking of beer, during the recording of this episode we were drinking Heineken, brewed with care and passion in Holland.  And speaking of Holland, Professor Van der Liquor pays us another visit to clear up the mystery of why beer will overflow when you tap the top of a bottle with the bottom of another bottle.  

The heart of the episode centers around Schoolyard Rhymes and Taunts.  We really get to the origin story of our current juvenile behavior by examining the poems and songs we chanted as children that made us the man-child podcasters we are today.  It all starts with "Milk, milk, lemonade . . ." and goes downhill from there.  When we run out of schoolyard rhymes that we personally can recall, we go to our old friend the internet to round out the show.  We read from The Global Schoolyard Rhyme Project located at thesneeze.com and enjoy some raunchy, offensive and just plain confusing taunts from around the world.

To close out the show we visit another Miller Lite Man Law:

 

We also bid farewell to a friend and colleague, Dr. Driggs.  Stagger Lee by Nick Cave at the end of the show is dedicated to him.

At times juvenile, wildly offensive and outright racist and sexist, this is Episode 6.  Enjoy!

(to download as an mp3, right click on the direct download link and select, "Save As . . .")

 

 

Double D Episode 5.  Dependence Day.  40 Oz. to Freedom.  Will Hung.  The Mile High Podcast.  Edward FortyHands.  Prof. Van der Liquor.  Pure Water vs. Salt Water.  Lime in the Coconut.  Well cooked vs. well done steaks.  The Ole 96'er.  Congrats to Joey Chestnut.  To A1 or not A1.  Technical Difficulty.  Straight Outta Compton to bridge the gap.  Football vs. Soccer.  Vomitus Prime.  National Anthem and Take Me Out to the Ballgame Fails.  Hell.  (From this point on the drunkenness noticeably increases, typified by slurred speech, mispronunciations and general confusion.  Success!)  Fireworks show cancelled.  Glo-Worms, aka Burning Cat Turds.  Blowing up Legos and ants.  Twilight Eclipse vs. Richard Pryor and The Wino.  Ska Cubano and Big Bamboo.  Man Law - Overflow.  Mexican Word of the Day - Urine.  Cisco Kid.

 

Double D Episode 4. Cuatro. Dreadlocks. Jamaican Lager. Red Stripe. Reggae. Hooray Beer. Famous Black people of the 80's being murdered. Shannon Price. Boycotting Arizona and other states far from Mexico. Peggy West. Saturday Morning Cartoons. Gadgets and Gizmos of the Coyote. Danger Mouse, stupid limey rodent spy. Schoolhouse Rock. The Baseball Bunch. Breakfast Cereals. Boo Berry was one of five Monster Cereals, name the others. Classic TV show theme songs. Over 2 hours of drunken audio funtime.

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Drink a beer, watch some cartoons, eat some cereal, live your life.

(to download this episode as an mp3, right click on the direct download link and select "Save As . . . ")

 

Double D Episode 3. Dad's Day. Fire on the Mountain. Sierra Nevada and Honey Moon and Red Stripe Bombers. Flagstaff Music Festival. Dad Dancing. Hippie Chicks and grabbing full cheeks. Cole Slaw secret ingredients. Dutchipino. Alcohol proof. Everclear and drinking contests. Double T - Tequila tolerance. San Felipe's Wall of Fame. Man Law: Double D - Don't Drive. Double D Advice for Virgins. Pet the snake on the belly, not the back. Disappointments in the sack. Back Door Play. Oral high fives. Do Pigs have corkscrew members? Man Law #16 - The Garage is the Line. Iron Man 2 - our review. Sack Up America - Booing Commercials before movies. Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Back when Saturday Morning Cartoons were racist. What would you grab if you had to evacuate your house due to fire? Mexican Word of the Day: African.

Leave comments and complaints:  doubledpodcast@gmail.com
Leave a message after the beep:  4242-DRUNKS  (424-237-8657)
Tell friends to go to:  www.doubledpodcast.com

(download this episode as an mp3.  Right-click on the Direct Download Link and select "Save As . . .")